View in a Space

Somethings I Remember 2023

by Jonathan Oakes

Acrylic on canvas (Acrylic & pencil)

h 25  x  w 25  x  d 5 cm
h 9.8  x  w 9.8  x  d 2 in

£180.00

(unframed stretched canvas)

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Description

When I have a good day, things go well and there is not a fuzziness to my thoughts. I obey the list that I might have written down the night before, just as a reminder of the daily tasks that I choose to do. I remember the large variety of passwords that I am forced to try and remember; otherwise it is such a fuss when I forget. I never use to be like this, before I came here, my days were different then. Daily life seemed less troublesome. As the day goes on I sometimes forget to do some of the things on my list. Distracting myself with my memories and the daydreams of now.
On the good days my friends might come and visit and they ask me if I am having a good day? “So far, so good.” I reply as there is usually more of the day to come. Don't get me wrong I am pleased when they come and see me, but we do nothing more than talk about the old days and the people we use to know and some that we did not. It is nice to have the company, but I don't rely on them. I am on my own more than I am not, and that is quite nice and normal for most of the time.
On other days I do not want their company and do my best to tell them so. I cannot understand, however that when my sister comes she looks so sad and pleads and cries most of the time, and why does she insist in calling me Dad? Surely I cannot be the one that is confused? She is the one that is getting it all wrong. Then she tells me that she will be here tomorrow at the same time. When the time does come tomorrow a stranger comes and weeps instead. I talk to her of what we did when we were growing up, the friends we had and our adventures. How is it that she does not remember? It confuses me when people change when they have known me all my life.
I like to remember the early days, back when I was safe.